random fun

thought i give it a fun run on this one, yah, i side tracked a bit. but this is good practice for when i go back.

moving to colors

random stuff.
colors is a way to go from now on, i think i will turn the one scene with Guts swing that sword above his head to colors now. you can only do soo much with gray scale drawing but colors is where i need to get good at. however i may started off with gray scale drawings just so i can overlay it with colors initially .

newly learned.

crap, will i ever finish this piece???

found more neat new tricks, woo hoo! this house is too hot for me!! hopefully it ll cool down soon cause i m leaving other wise.

There's just no way i can focus on just one drawing, i will have at least 3-5 drawing that i will be working on finishing up that way i can quickly jump to the other drawings ones i m bored with one. this one is really fun, give me more time to play with lighting.

Thinking, thinking, thinking.

I just realized I have no more obligation in this town. Now that I am not linked to the shop any longer I am thinking that i may just leave. Going back to Tucson would be pretty good, a place to stay, Mother. But then again, i don't want to get too comfortable there and get no where with my life. ( oh god i m old!!) I still want to go out there and achived my goals.. actually i need to clearify what my goals really are. over the years it has been distorted. It would be a step back ward really if i moved back, ..i really have no roots here. i have many dear friends here but when i m gone i will always think of them. Moving to a new town would be so exciting, meeting new people, making new friends.

If only i can get this tattoo thing up and running and become known even a little bit. i would have no problems moving around. .. I m thinking that i may just ...moving does require quite a bit of money..money i can get..by ..robbign a bank...hahah. My little sister will be returing to Tucson to finish her RN degree next summer. ..I wish i could go live with her in SF . I suppose to go visit here at the end of the years for a few week. can't wait for that. i like the winter there. then i can go see Hana and Dan too. ..I must get out!!!

notes: take all unecceary things back home to Tucson, unless i really really need it then it has got to go.
things to keep.
-computer
- tattoo stuff
- sculpture supplies
-drawing stuff
-cloths
everythign else gone!! and i do have more shits then i need that's for damn sure, only need enough stuff to fit in car for one load. ..maybe two. right now i have about 7. until tomorrow.

...

more updates on this one, i guess it will be the piece i m working on, gives me a chance to play with more textures. then ones that's done i will color it.

Just got a bottle of wine and no wine opener...bummer :( no drunken tonight.

++Positive Energy! ++

texture painting. now it don't look so smooth, i like it
just when i thought i was about to get done. lol, now i m reworking the shoulder guard. should be done today. then on to the next piece.
Jose , almost there. one more session and we should be all done. i think the next thing he wants is an evil doll of some type on his calf.
Lorrisa, touch up of her old tattoo which she her self created in school while in class. thats pretty amazing to be able to do that in class.

Ok, So being Negative isn't going to solve anything.
No matter how I think, there alway someone out there who's main goal in life is to turn someone eles's life up side down. and that's fine. maybe they had a rough life? or just an asshole. and need a place or someoen to take it out on...i m just glad i can help.
I hate being mad at silly stuff like that.

Ok, so i may not be able to do what i want to do for a bit, no reason to stress over it, eventually It will come. I was thinking of doing an Autoclave funds raiser event, so far Jose has pitched in 25 bucks, lets see thats only 1175 dollar more that i need. positive thinking will definitely help, will not help with getting it sooner,but with my mind... i m always stressing over silly stuff like that..maybe some money will fall out of the sky and i won't even notcied it :P some of my friends are welling to pitch in, so that will help alot. I wonder if there's a place in town that will sterilized my stuff for resonable price. will research that this coming week. I could go to the shop and ask if i can use theirs for a few dollars. but at this point, i dont really want to be there really.
my other alternative is to use disposible tubes.. which i hate very much cause it shakes really bad, shaking and tattooing not good combination.
I was relieing on the shop to sterlized all my stuff, and now that i am no longer there. and now that i need to sterlize my stuff i didn't know how expensive and Autoclave can be.
I learned not to relie on anyone for anything = good and bad.

there are very few poeople out there that i dislike or can't get along with. But i guess no matter how hard i try i just can't please everyone.

I just need to stay focus , ignore all negativities along the way and go out there and own!!!

Shit outa luck!!!..again

Mother Fucker, Bi.ch, Sh.t! Ass, Cock F..k Damn, ..Bahhhh!!!!

keeping on going

yay! (somehow it feels like i just did this , oh well) i m on the roll, soon i ll be ready to move to colors. i can't wait, one day I want to go into Concept art. one day.. this one only took and hour or less to finish, not sure exactly but got it done faster ..
its hard to not notice the deformation in the skull, there's some part in there that just make no sense. What I really need to get is a SKULL. ...the real one are pretty expensive. ..I will save for one of those. If i can get my tattoo to look somethign like that i ll be good to go, and i know i can just need more time and dedication. and as of late i have alot of those lately , thankfully. and ones i get there, i can take a loooong vacation.

Today my mother was bugging me about when I'm gona get a wify and start a family., lol i always give her the same reply..when i meet the right one. (and then i added, you know some people go on with their life with out ever meeting the love of their life, ha and then she told me i was crazy) Dear mother wants Grandchild she said. and she said that im getting old. :( she is getting old too. I would like to have at least one for her before ..she..well ,she has always been sick and ...well i hope nothing bad will ever happen to my mother. she suggest that i should go back to Thailand or soem other country maybe Russian or something. (her husband worked there for 9 years and have alway told me that if i wanted to find a good wife i should go there) sigh, only if it was that easy, i would already have one. but I guess that would make life boring and dull. ..or i could just save up a good chuck of cash and begone. what a great idea!
ha i like this song.

good enough

sweet! picked up more new tricks tonight, i miss sculpting. i m thinking of doing that this weekend. but then again, i have sooo much drawing to complete. blahhh. got me more tattoo supplies to day, but the effin company send me the wrong needles. need autoclave....like right now!!
next up, i have 3 skulls to finish for Saturday. fairly straight forward.
yah, that's just about done, there suppose to be smokes around the head some in front of the head. but i ll do that later but for not it is done.

The Snakes continues to hunt me in my dreams, I took a small one hour nap and it was there, in my front yard...in a pileof cactus. its mouth open ..very much like the way the Predator's mouth looks like and then a small rattle snake tries to attack me. ...hahah, suckers can't get me!

still can't figure out what it means I wishes what my mother'd told me what it means is true.

another day gone..

and with my super Nerd skill i was able to get this , still got a bit of work to do, but man, it is one deformed dragon. ..oh well,
photo of the outline of the tattoo.
FINISHING up this , can't be on it for too long, i have to cut it off fairly quickly due to time. ...that is my problems this days.
this is the style were going for. with the idea below.

Caution: many bad grammars

Don't look at me, I m just following order. It was my friend's idea. I personally think its not the best position to do that. realisticly she should be on her knee in order for him to be able to position himself so that he can swing with enough power to chop though her . the idea is to take this initial design and match the style to the drawing above.
as i said, i dont really like the position really, i think she, her body should be pointing more toward the camera, on her knee with his hand holding her shoulder, but if that is the case then depending on how the camera angled, it may looks like the guy is just standign behide her, and not doing her at the same time. whew! this is hard. I will need to watch more porns...for research purposes..of course.

jumping the gun again. if you look at this and compare to the latest one i m working on , this one needs to be more dirty, more randome texture though out the piece to give it personality. looks like it was done by two different artist. if anyone remember this , i drew this one back in Feb of this year i think . now i just want to go back and fill the back ground with lots of guys standing around waiting their turns and bodys litering the gound, should be fun. it needs a darker mood, with dramatic lighting..in theright spot.
I was on this for 3 hours today, was having a hell of a time, trying to shading it in. my contact lens was geting dry really fast and it blured my vision..so that was rathe annoying, need to get a new glass asap if i am to tattoo gooderly. still fun though.

NOTE TO SELF: NEED GLASSES, ASAP!!!!!
I wonder where Miss Alyse went, hopefully she's doing alright.

tattoos drawings

time to catch up on some tattoo design before it gets out of control again... as if i hasn't already have.

REturn of the Snake.

I was talking with Alyse about it the other night and its back...How weird.

this moring about 10 mins into my sleep (around 8 in the moring) in my dream i was back home in Tucson in the back yard watching my mother working on her garden. we have a pretty good size back yard and every chance she has my mother would pretty much turn it green. It was pretty amazing to set back there when everything is fully grown. my mother have all this exotic asian vegetation and herbs. but that was years ago and now she's living with her husband, so the back yard is pretty much empty again. anyways as i was standing there, my mother turned around and yelled at me "snake" confused , i was thinking to my self "snake?" here? wah? "
it was a small snake, looks to be a cobra of somekind.
it tries to strike me many time fortunately with my Ninja reflex i manage to dodge it all. then the dream faded into the scene. i was standing in our parking lot up front with my sister. she picked up something ..i think it was a garbage bag, and then i saw what looked to be another snake, same as the one trying to attack me earlier, but it was only the lower half of it. as i stood there trying to figured out where the rest of the body went. my little sister point to my foot , i looked down and i saw the bastard, i trying to reach for it, but somehow managed to clam up my leg into my pants with half of its body missing. seconds later i was bitten...before i can feel anything i was awake. ...
i wonder what it means, it is not like most snakes dreams i had though out my life. the mood, the setting , even the size and behavior of the snakes are totally different. my mom told me it means one thing while someone told me something else.

in the past, when i was in high school , we used to go out in the desert collecting Hohoba beans, I think they use it to make shampoo. out of four of us, i was the only one that come across snakes quite a few too. mainly Rattle snakes. none of it were threatening or anything, but i would alway managed to find them. one time as we walked home on this trail , the sun was almost down, i was the last person on the trail behide my mother and her husband was in front. I dont know what happened but they did't see a huge rattle snake moving along the trail right next to them. her husband walked right passed it, and then as my mother was about to walk up to it, i looked down and saw it ( i think it must be at leat 5' long) i grabed on her arm or shoulder ,,dont rememember and point it out to her. the snake didn't seemed very aggressive at all, it just went along its own business and that was that.
my mother was even surprise how i managed to came across soo many snakes.

we also came across many interesting wild life out there besides snakes, or maybe it was minly just me. we saw this animal that looks like deer of somekind. unfortunately they bolted before i can pet them
we came across this thing.. with black fur.before we can identify it, it dashed into a whole. being young and curious, I decided to yanked on its tail. heh, then i was like sweet! i m gona take it home. i yanked on it for a while but couldn't get a good grip. so i tooked off my t-shirt and wrapped it around my hand. as i continue pulling. seconds later there was this very horrible smells. LOl, then we realized what the creature was .. A Skunk...needless to say, i threw away my t shirt after that.
I found this mini owl ,i meant it was tiny, probably slightly smaller then a computer mouse. anyways it looked like it was injured because it was on the ground (to me birds usually are on trees or is flying, the only time they re actually on the ground is when they feed or when they re injured.) and it was oddly small so i assumed it was a baby owl. anyway, i cought it and took it home, thanking that i could nurse it into health and most likely let it go. i placed it in a card bard box, gave it some water and feed it warms, (those that was used for finishing) a few days later we decided to drop it off where we found it. i did some research and came to find out that it was actually a full gron Owl. and it was suppose to be that size. tiny. anyways, it was listed as endanger specie so i was glad i didn't see it die.
as a child i was alway curios about all this empty holes i found along the hill side. in my mind i imagine some wild beast living in it. but fortunately never came across any that exciting. it was usually empty, or everynow and then i would come across snakes. one time i found a pretty good size Tortous (turtle) in thie hole. being me i have to alway pull on it. anyways i managed to get it out and i took it to show my mother. she was so excited by my finding. heh, lets eat it!! only kidding. i don't remember what we wanted to do with it, but in the end i just let it go. it was rather cute i though, and it was slow at moving. the desert was full of life. one time i came across hundreads of dollars worth of Foodstamp, I wasn't sure if i could use it so i just threw it out.
years later i went back hoping to revisit some of the site. unfortunately every was damaged and gone due to housing ..damn human, i hate you all.

Sleep or not to sleep..wait..

well, that obsolutely made no sense at all. i m sooo tired, but dont feel like sleeping.
blah blah. i should go sleep , good night. a quick test with texture brush
umm... more rework, needed to redo his head. and touched up the monster more. what slow process. at this rate i should be done by next year for sure.
more texture brushes test.

currently ffinishing up this one.

must finish things before moving on to next thing. no more messing around. .

Hunged out with Stacy, Cat and two of her friends at First Friday. lol, wild ladies.
Stacy!! I haven't seen her since i graduated, probably 2 years ago. whew, time sure fly. afte ward we went to join Mario's after hour party had some delicous food and caught up on some life stories. good times.

world crashing down

heh, that seemed to be happening alot as of late, most time i chose to be oblivous to it...Fuck you!!!

My fist day at the PAC meeting.

united at last

my wacom is back with me at last.
now to take care of it, this thing is rather expensive to replace.

random crap.
there was this girl that i was interested in, this was sometime ago. at that time she was fishing around which is all cool, i can understand that i was doing the same, then again which guy doen't? . i obviously wasn't the prime catch and that's fine, life goes on. "good luck, bye!" months went by and now she's back (not naming any names cause ..there has been many ..ha) wanting to chat and hang out. one side of me wants to welcome her with open arms while the other side..well, not sure really. I can't help but to feel .. fill in the blank. ..geezes , you brushed me off and never give me your time of day and now what? i don't have time for this crap. i personally prefer the second side, but at the same time i can't really see myself doing that. :[ maybe i ll just play nice and hang out and do stuff with her, but all i can offer is my friendship. sorry but the boat has left the port.

what i don't get is why they can't just say "hey , you know what i m sorry, i m just not interested in you" chatree==> Hooray!! thank you! good luck and good bye! instead they would leave you hanging , wondering geez i wonder why she doesn't return my call ? it would make too much sense i guess, maybe its too hard to do? but i get the hints.
what s worst is knowing that I'm just another guy she puts on the side line, something to fall back on just incase the next guy she meets dosn't work. ...you know what! screw this!! i m outa here!

now, be nice!!

its funny when the table turns.



in other new, i may or may not be at the shop anymore.

cheers to moneyless!

aztec update

still got quite a ways to go,but it feels nice to have it closer to being and not just hunged on the wall .